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Wednesday, August 21, 2013

My friend!

When I think about divorce, I think of friends!
What has it got to do with it?
Friends wield unimaginable influence in our lives! We spend time discussing with our friends, rubbing minds, sharing ideas, seeking for second opinions, counselling, encouraging, discouraging, persuading, dissuading, etc.
Once I looked around me and I found that not a single friend (or close relative) of mine drove a car while his wife jumped buses! If there was only one car, the wife had it! I think I know the big brother from whom the influence came.
Once a guy beat up his girl friend. It was so serious that she was admitted in the hospital. Not to worry, they broke up after! I bounced the incident off a few necessary guys. One said there are often disagreements and anything could result! Another said that some women will never get the message till you beat them!
Hmm???
I didn't have to ask my core friends! It would amount to negative utilization of precious time! They can never conceive the idea of a slap, not to mention a strike! But what could the lesson be?
I imagine again that i have those two guys as my only friends, and we all married. Even if I never thought it plausible to assault a woman (or man), it would be only a matter of time before one would begin to evaluate the veracity of their opinion.
Have you noticed that your investment decisions are influenced by the people closest to you? Or your decision for further studies? Or the number of children to have? The country to remain in, or relocate to? The candidate to vote for in an election?
How to respond to a misdemeanour of a spouse? How to discipline children? How to spend your 24 hours a day!
I remember my friend who posted my application for my 1st major job during National Service in Owerri, on my behalf. I remember it was my sister who applied for my present job, on my behalf! I remember those we studied together through university. I remember those we dated our first queens at the same time! I remember the three friends who applied for my last professional course, on my behalf! There are those who seem to have sleepless nights over my personal concerns, even when I sleep throught the night.
Can you remember / imagine the influence of friends on your life?
Certainly there are exceptions!
But maybe a change of friends could propel some of us forward!

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